While many countdown to the end of the school year, thinking about summer typically makes me anxious. How will we fill up our time in constructive ways? How will we avoid major meltdowns? How will we manage playdates and other social situations? How will we positively channel all of the energy? (So. Much. Energy!)
Over time I’ve come to realize that summer success for us can pretty easily be summarized by structure, sensory input, and schedules (think visual). Now that we’re at the mid-way point of this summer, I thought I’d share some of the things that have helped keep us on track. Of course, nothing works 100 percent of the time. Every day isn’t perfect, but we seem to have found a rhythm that works fairly well for our kids this summer – one we’ll likely replicate in the future.
Structure: We enrolled Fletcher in a 3-hour camp 5 days each week. It starts mid-morning which gives him time to wake up and ease into the day, but also forces him to get moving. This particular day camp places tremendous emphasis on being outside and they have a science-related theme each week which he really connects with. They’re heavy on the art projects which typically isn’t his jam, but he is loving everything about camp this summer and he’s proud to bring his projects home to show us. It provides him with a social outlet that he desperately needs, a physical outlet which is imperative for his success, and also gives him access to other adults who gently encourage him when he needs it.
Fletcher has time in the afternoons to unwind a bit, but then we’re off to ninja class, OT or baseball four out of five evenings most weeks. We’re never this scheduled during the school year, but have found he really benefits from having so many structured activities during the summer. Especially when they’re heavy on the physical activity (that in itself is regulating for him).
We opted to enroll Max in private swimming lessons, recognizing that the noise and over stimulation of a pool full of other kiddos wouldn’t work for him. He has therapy twice a week and we’ve figured out a structured schedule for him during the time that Fletcher is at camp to work on getting him ready to start K-3 in the Fall.
I’m not going to lie, come Friday, Mike and I are exhausted. But this has been our most successful summer thus far – by a landslide. I feel like we’ve found a balance where each of our boys is engaged in just enough for them and we still have plenty of time as a family to hike, play outside, go on little adventures, etc. What we know is that finding that sweet spot is critical for us to both survive and thrive during summer. (We have been reminded that summer spontaneity doesn’t always work for our crew – but that’s for another post entirely!)
Structure looks different for every family. It may mean daycare, play dates, day camp, summer school – it doesn’t really matter what it is as long as it provides the child with an opportunity to feel settled and safe with access to the strategies and tools they need to manage their sensory needs.
Sensory Input: Give us all the physical, proprioceptive and vestibular activity. All day, every day!
Both of our boys require a lot of sensory input to achieve and maintain regulation. Some days require more than others and we’re not always successful, but it’s not for lack of trying.
We invested in a giant trampoline in our backyard this summer (we’re very fortunate to have the space for such a thing and found a great sale – but the same input can be achieved with a smaller trampoline, inflatable bounce house, etc.), have different kinds of swings, a hammock, climbing holds on our tree (I never knew that ratchet straps were so awesome, totally recommend these if you have access to a decent-sized tree but don’t want to drill into it!) and lots of places to crash in the house.
Recently, Fletcher has been asking for deep pressure and Max has been holding his head in a way to indicate that he’d like some, too. So we do a lot of squeezes, some brushing, rolling with a back massager and even some mindfulness. (I listed some of our favorite ways to get proprioceptive and vestibular input on our website as well as ideas for compression, but I strongly recommend seeking the expertise of an occupational therapist to help determine the right sensory diet for your child.)
This, too, has required that we work really hard to be present so we are in-tune with what our boys need. We find ourselves asking Fletcher “what does your body need?” pretty frequently, and with the help of a few years of Zones of Regulation, HALT and Occupational Therapy, he’s usually able to tell us.
Max uses a communication device to talk with us so we’ve added buttons for “hug”, “squeeze my feet”, “swing”, “trampoline”, etc. to his talker. He has become really good at using those specific buttons when he needs something.
Our boys having the tools they need to communicate that they need input and even what type of input they’re craving has been an incredible gift for us. Does it take practice? Absolutely. Does it require that we as their parents model for them? Yes. Is all of the time invested worth it? 100%.
Schedules: We’re big fans of visual schedules. Fletcher doesn’t need them quite as much anymore, but if there’s a big change in routine, we’ll still make one for him. He’s been a little pokey in the mornings, so we’re likely going back to our morning checklist soon here – we got a little out of routine after the school year and I can tell!
In general, the visual schedule (whether a checklist, timeline, list, etc.) gives our kids’ brains the time to organize around what’s coming next, what’s expected of them, or what transitions are ahead. It gives them some control in a situation, especially if they’re able to check things off as they complete them and typically means less meltdowns and more independence.
While it does take a little effort to put a visual schedule together and then change/update as needed, it’s a worthwhile investment of time on the front end because in our experience, it significantly reduces the time we spend navigating meltdowns or negotiations on the back end.