by Annie | Aug 27, 2021 | Blog
Beyond all things pumpkin spice, Fall brings the excitement of a new school year, reuniting with friends and teachers and the delight of a backpack full of school supplies. For children who struggle with functional transitions, it is important to develop a routine and schedule to ease the anticipation of so many changes happening at once.
By decreasing anticipation, worry and anxiety, transitions are typically much smoother. Repetition is key—practice, practice, practice! Children who have difficulties with transitions may benefit from practicing their school routine days or weeks in advance. Following are suggestions for things to practice ahead of the school year, strategies for easing transitions, ideas for getting children the sensory input they need throughout the day and brain break ideas.
Things to practice ahead of the first day of school:
- Morning routine at home
- Walking/driving to bus stop and/or
- Walking/driving to school
- Lining up, practice
- Opening lunchbox
- Wearing mask for extended periods of time – practicing with a timer to increase tolerance (if masks are required)
- Meeting teacher
- Identifying what entrance they’ll use
- Touring the school
Strategies for easing transitions:
- Picture of family or pet inside desk, folder, pencil case, etc.
- Use simple language “first, then” statements
- First, we will walk to school, then you will line up outside and wait for your teacher
- Transitional item
- For example, a stuffed animal (small) that is used to help transition to school. It is given in the car or walk to school and then remains in the backpack until the end of the school day.
- Other transitional items include, matching bracelet with parents, picture of family, small toy/stuffed animal
- Sometimes transitional items can become a distraction so it is important to explain to the child the purpose and intent of this special
- Social story
- Sometimes actual/real images of the classroom, teacher, cafeteria, coat hook, desk, etc. can help ease the transition however, other kids may respond just as well to clipart images (See this Back to School Social Story for an example. Feel free to use this one, find another version online or create your own!)
- Going through the school routine (going to the school, driving/walking)
- Practice opening and eating from lunch box
Sensory Input and Brain Breaks:
Sensory input and brain breaks should be completed every 1-2 hours (depending on the child’s regulation needs). Breaks should be 10-15 minutes and should include heavy work activities (pushing, pulling, carrying, lifting, etc.). Sensory and brain breaks help to promote regulation and system calming by providing the body with heavy input to the muscles/joints. This can easily be incorporated directly into classroom activities, but should be discussed with the child’s teacher.
Sensory input during the school day:
Brain Break Ideas:
Heavy work before/after school:
- Walking to school with extra “weight” in backpack (wipes, books, etc.)
- Riding bike or scooter to school
- Pulling wagon to school
- Playing with resistive objects in the car on the way to school (pop tube, Legos, Squigz, pop-it, etc.)
Wishing you and yours a wonderful school year!
Emily
by Annie | Aug 12, 2021 | Blog
Today was tough. That happens sometimes. We had two really difficult therapy appointments with Max this morning and that kind of set the tone for the day. I left feeling completely drained. One of the most difficult parts of this journey is watching our boys struggle. (And then I went down the rabbit hole of “wondering how on Earth his first school experience is going to go in Fall…so many feelings.)
On days like this I have to remind myself that even though there are hard moments that turn into difficult days, I’m doing my best, WE are doing our best, and our boys are giving us their best. Best doesn’t always mean easy. But we can work with best.
I struggled to get to a place of gratitude and validation on my own tonight after the kids were in bed. I sat in silence while Mike put the kids to bed – I was completely zapped. I was reminded that it’s okay to cry and I cried. We processed together, I admitted how anxious I am about the start of the school year and we talked about our collective trepidation about the numerous transitions in the coming months. Deep breaths. And tomorrow is a new day.
I used to pick myself up by my bootstraps and blow right through the hard days. But over time I’ve learned that I have to give myself permission to feel how hard things can be sometimes, sit with that for a minute, complete the stress cycle* however that looks and then figure out a path forward. When I didn’t honor feeling overwhelmed, drained, upset, terrified…. It always, always manifested in some other way.
So here’s to a better tomorrow for us and for anyone else who struggled today. It will get better.
XOXO
*A note about completing the stress cycle. A dear friend of mine gifted me with the book Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski. It has really resonated with me. That stress has to go somewhere and completing the cycle makes complete sense. The audio version is great, too.
by Annie | Aug 10, 2021 | Blog
Sensory challenges are HARD. For us, the lack of predictability can be agonizing and the amount of work that goes into managing transitions often feels like a lot. But, the visual schedules, regulation strategies, sensory diet and therapy appointments are totally worth the time and effort.
Two and a half years after starting occupational therapy, we have a completely different kid than before. This is largely due to strategies, heavy work, structure and consistency with appointments. Fletcher has come so far. Sometimes we forget that. Sure, he has moments of dysregulation, but I can’t tell you the last time we had a total meltdown. He has so many tools in his toolbox that he uses them as needed – often without any reminders.
When we entered that OT office for the first time, I was grasping at straws. I needed something – ANYTHING to help us navigate the frequent meltdowns, difficulty with transitions and defiance. Our boy was struggling and we were operating below empty.
I talked about Zones of Regulation in a previous post and I am not kidding when I say that it changed our lives. Truly. But it wasn’t immediate. It helped more quickly than other strategies I think, but it required our commitment to implementing it at home. Mike and I had to be on the same page and then bring Fletcher along with us. We adopted the language as our own. And honestly, we still use it as a way to help Fletch understand where we’re at. The other day I heard Mike say “Fletcher, the longer your body stays at yellow, the more my body feels red. Let’s figure out what your body needs.”
Here’s the thing. Strategies for helping to navigate sensory challenges aren’t about a quick fix. This is more about playing the long game. The work that’s put in on the front end will eventually pay off in the long run. It may be difficult to see, especially when you’re living it day in and day out. But then one day, you’ll take a minute to pause and look back and realize how much your collective efforts helped your little love grow and evolve.
We’re noticing the same thing with Max. While he needs different interventions than Fletcher, it’s the same principle. Commitment to consistency with therapy and strategies, putting his sensory diet at the top of our list of priorities and working really hard to be in tune with what he’s telling us he needs through his actions. And overall, trusting the process.
Trust comes into play a lot in supporting our boys. Trusting the therapists who are helping us navigate SPD, trusting ourselves as parents who want the best for our boys, trusting our respective guts when something (or someone) just doesn’t feel right and advocating for something different. And trusting each other as partners – recognizing that we want the same things for our babies, are a team, and honoring when our other half needs a break.
All of this takes practice. It isn’t perfect. But we have found that while challenging at times, it’s worth it. We live by “progress over perfection” and “slow and steady wins the race.”
by Annie | Jul 29, 2021 | Blog
Shoe tying… a rite of passage of some littles, and a source of complete and utter frustration for others. Children typically begin tying their own shoes between 5.5-6 years of age. As the school year is fast approaching, I thought I’d provide some resources and strategies for families interested in working on shoe tying in the coming weeks.
For a child to be ready for shoe tying the following skills should continue to be practiced and mastered: bilateral integration (using two hands), crossing midline, fine motor skills/manipulation, sequencing, dexterity, strength, coordination, and visual motor integration.
Foundational Skills
Bilateral Integration Activities: lacing cards, holding a container and placing objects into it with opposing hand, stacking blocks, clapping, tearing paper
Crossing Midline Activities: cross crawls (using one arm, crossing body, and touching opposing knee), windmills, ball pass (standing back-to-back and passing ball without moving feet), dancing, drawing a large figure 8 pattern, tennis, Simon Says
Fine Motor and Dexterity Activities: peeling stickers off shirt, bead stringing, coloring, clothespins, pop beads, lacing cards
Sequencing Activities: obstacle courses, scavenger hunts, following a verbal/written list of directions/instructions
Strengthening Activities: putty, Play Doh, resistive toys (Mr. Potato Head, Zoobs, Legos), clothespins, rubber band board, spinning toys/tops, tongs
Visual-motor Integration Activities: mazes, dot-to-dots, Spot It, Where’s Waldo, Ispy, hidden pictures
Learning to Tie Shoes
- I often recommend that a child begin practicing shoe tying on a shoe that is off however in front of them in the same alignment/orientation as if it was on their foot (pointed away from child)
- I typically suggest starting by practicing with dual-colored laces to allow for visual discrimination to assist with the shoe tying process. You can also tie two colored laces together and lace them on the shoe.
- Practicing using stiffer laces to decrease the floppiness of traditional ties (practice tying and manipulating ties using pipe cleaners)
- This video captures the exact method I teach many of my clients when they’re just learning. I find it really reduces frustration and eliminates a lot of the confusion associated with a more traditional way of tying.
Don’t fret if your child is not ready for shoe tying! There are plenty of stylish alternatives to traditional laces on shoes for kids– no matter their age. Work on this particular life skill as your child is ready. If it becomes a source of frustration, revisit when your child is calm and well-rested. Kids learn things at their own pace and that’s completely okay!
Happy shoe tying!
Emily
by Annie | Jul 26, 2021 | Blog
While many countdown to the end of the school year, thinking about summer typically makes me anxious. How will we fill up our time in constructive ways? How will we avoid major meltdowns? How will we manage playdates and other social situations? How will we positively channel all of the energy? (So. Much. Energy!)
Over time I’ve come to realize that summer success for us can pretty easily be summarized by structure, sensory input, and schedules (think visual). Now that we’re at the mid-way point of this summer, I thought I’d share some of the things that have helped keep us on track. Of course, nothing works 100 percent of the time. Every day isn’t perfect, but we seem to have found a rhythm that works fairly well for our kids this summer – one we’ll likely replicate in the future.
Structure: We enrolled Fletcher in a 3-hour camp 5 days each week. It starts mid-morning which gives him time to wake up and ease into the day, but also forces him to get moving. This particular day camp places tremendous emphasis on being outside and they have a science-related theme each week which he really connects with. They’re heavy on the art projects which typically isn’t his jam, but he is loving everything about camp this summer and he’s proud to bring his projects home to show us. It provides him with a social outlet that he desperately needs, a physical outlet which is imperative for his success, and also gives him access to other adults who gently encourage him when he needs it.
Fletcher has time in the afternoons to unwind a bit, but then we’re off to ninja class, OT or baseball four out of five evenings most weeks. We’re never this scheduled during the school year, but have found he really benefits from having so many structured activities during the summer. Especially when they’re heavy on the physical activity (that in itself is regulating for him).
We opted to enroll Max in private swimming lessons, recognizing that the noise and over stimulation of a pool full of other kiddos wouldn’t work for him. He has therapy twice a week and we’ve figured out a structured schedule for him during the time that Fletcher is at camp to work on getting him ready to start K-3 in the Fall.
I’m not going to lie, come Friday, Mike and I are exhausted. But this has been our most successful summer thus far – by a landslide. I feel like we’ve found a balance where each of our boys is engaged in just enough for them and we still have plenty of time as a family to hike, play outside, go on little adventures, etc. What we know is that finding that sweet spot is critical for us to both survive and thrive during summer. (We have been reminded that summer spontaneity doesn’t always work for our crew – but that’s for another post entirely!)
Structure looks different for every family. It may mean daycare, play dates, day camp, summer school – it doesn’t really matter what it is as long as it provides the child with an opportunity to feel settled and safe with access to the strategies and tools they need to manage their sensory needs.
Sensory Input: Give us all the physical, proprioceptive and vestibular activity. All day, every day!
Both of our boys require a lot of sensory input to achieve and maintain regulation. Some days require more than others and we’re not always successful, but it’s not for lack of trying.
We invested in a giant trampoline in our backyard this summer (we’re very fortunate to have the space for such a thing and found a great sale – but the same input can be achieved with a smaller trampoline, inflatable bounce house, etc.), have different kinds of swings, a hammock, climbing holds on our tree (I never knew that ratchet straps were so awesome, totally recommend these if you have access to a decent-sized tree but don’t want to drill into it!) and lots of places to crash in the house.
Recently, Fletcher has been asking for deep pressure and Max has been holding his head in a way to indicate that he’d like some, too. So we do a lot of squeezes, some brushing, rolling with a back massager and even some mindfulness. (I listed some of our favorite ways to get proprioceptive and vestibular input on our website as well as ideas for compression, but I strongly recommend seeking the expertise of an occupational therapist to help determine the right sensory diet for your child.)
This, too, has required that we work really hard to be present so we are in-tune with what our boys need. We find ourselves asking Fletcher “what does your body need?” pretty frequently, and with the help of a few years of Zones of Regulation, HALT and Occupational Therapy, he’s usually able to tell us.
Max uses a communication device to talk with us so we’ve added buttons for “hug”, “squeeze my feet”, “swing”, “trampoline”, etc. to his talker. He has become really good at using those specific buttons when he needs something.
Our boys having the tools they need to communicate that they need input and even what type of input they’re craving has been an incredible gift for us. Does it take practice? Absolutely. Does it require that we as their parents model for them? Yes. Is all of the time invested worth it? 100%.
Schedules: We’re big fans of visual schedules. Fletcher doesn’t need them quite as much anymore, but if there’s a big change in routine, we’ll still make one for him. He’s been a little pokey in the mornings, so we’re likely going back to our morning checklist soon here – we got a little out of routine after the school year and I can tell!
In general, the visual schedule (whether a checklist, timeline, list, etc.) gives our kids’ brains the time to organize around what’s coming next, what’s expected of them, or what transitions are ahead. It gives them some control in a situation, especially if they’re able to check things off as they complete them and typically means less meltdowns and more independence.
While it does take a little effort to put a visual schedule together and then change/update as needed, it’s a worthwhile investment of time on the front end because in our experience, it significantly reduces the time we spend navigating meltdowns or negotiations on the back end.
