by Annie | Mar 13, 2021 | Blog
Let me tell you about Fletcher and his cousin, Ava. We call them cousin-siblings. Without sharing parents or residing under the same roof, they are as close to brother and sister as two children could possibly be. They are alike in the best, but most challenging ways – steadfast in their respective convictions, headstrong, sensitive and articulate. They don’t necessarily agree on most things, but they’re always the first to come to the others’ defense. They struggle with their own individual sensory integration challenges which means that usually the first twenty minutes of a visit is a roller coaster of emotions while they settle in. In time, they find their sweet spot and *usually* play with wild imaginations fueled by boundless energy. Watching them navigate their world of wonder when they find their stride is one of my greatest joys.
I discovered last summer that Fletcher and Ava are most successful when there is a neutral, guided activity to aid in their transition. Since we are in a shared pandemic bubble, we spend a lot of time together. In August I found myself preparing to home school them just in case virtual learning wasn’t a good fit – there were so many uncertainties then. As I found what I thought were fun and engaging activities, I’d give them a test drive. This is where fluffy slime entered our lives, made itself comfy and never left!
The first time we made it, I spread a vinyl picnic blanket out on the grass under the shade of a big tree in our backyard. It was a warm, sunny day in late summer. With fall looming, we were finding any reason to be outside. I brought out our ingredients – bowls, wooden spoons, measuring cups, Elmer’s glue, contact solution, baking soda, shaving cream, water. After some debate over who got which bowl, my little sensory scientists found their focus.
We followed the instructions exactly (there are a lot of recipes and videos online, we follow the version on The Best Ideas for Kids). And they were thrilled with the outcome. I was completely amazed when over an hour later, they were still completely enthralled with the end result of their experiment. Fluffy slime went down the slide, it went on the swings, it climbed, it ran, it was stretched and squished, and became an integral part of their make-believe play. They talked about how it turned from a liquid to a solid and dreamed of all the color combinations they would make the next time. They were completely regulated – with the help of all of the sensory input that beautiful fluffy slime provided. (They tend to like it better than traditional slime – it isn’t as gooey, slimy or super sticky after all the ingredients are incorporated.)
Since that summer day, fluffy slime has been the most highly sought-after activity from this pair of cousin-siblings. In fact, we made a fresh batch yesterday at Ava’s request (and to my delight). We made a last-minute addition of gold glitter to our green fluffy slime – after all, St. Patrick’s Day is right around the corner.
During yesterday’s fluffy slime adventure, I was reminded of a few pro-tips…
- If you are making this with multiple kiddos, I recommend pre-measuring the ingredients so they can actively pour and mix at the same time and no one has to wait. (Waiting, while a wonderful life skill, is realllllllly hard for our bunch and too much of it can make an activity go south in a snap!)
- Pay close attention to the specifics about the contact solution and shaving cream ingredients. It’s make or break.
- This slime is fun with or without color. We’ve used food coloring which is super messy and gets all over hands and arms – that part isn’t my favorite. We’ve also made it without color. The natural white color can be just as fun. We haven’t experimented with food dyes, but you could try a natural dye from berries or beets maybe to see how that turns out! (If you do, let me know how it goes!)
- Fluffy slime lends itself to add-ins like glitter, sprinkles, or event that little confetti people use to sprinkle on tables for parties or in cards (it’s not paper) – anything, really. Use your imagination to add dimension and additional sensory elements.
- You can also experiment with the various sounds that fluffy slime makes. I’m sure you can imagine what the fan favorite is with my crew. Because apparently flatulence in any form is just never NOT funny. 🙂
Photos of our fluffy slime adventures can be found on Swinging in the Rain’s Facebook and Instagram pages.
by Annie | Mar 12, 2021 | Blog
This morning I let myself feel how hard all of this can sometimes be. I don’t do that often, and I didn’t stay there long. But I needed to give myself a minute to acknowledge that I had reached my limit rather than just plowing ahead and pretending that everything felt manageable. The reality of serving as the ultimate safe space and emotional regulator for my beloved boys is that it just isn’t always… manageable.
Fletcher has hovered at “over the top” most of the week and was struggling with virtual learning this morning. The internet went out for a brief moment during his morning meeting and that was enough to throw him off kilter. Despite being “able” to do the work in tandem with his class, he “needed” me…my constant acknowledgement of him being on task and doing a great job and my most undivided, deliberate focus. Except at the same moment, Max was screeching to get my attention. Peppa Pig had paused and he “needed” another snack. Today, Max was more progressive snack buffet than any form of a well-rounded meal. His high pitched screeching, while his way of communicating his needs, is one of Fletcher’s greatest triggers. Fletcher’s auditory system has a hard time processing the frequency… so when there’s screeching from Max, there is almost always yelling from Fletcher – a cry of agony. It’s worth mentioning that the dog was also scratching at the back door, tenaciously requesting to go out for the third time in fifteen minutes. My mind was racing with all the things I have on my to do list and my anxiety was positioned to hit the top of the Richter scale. It was too much at once – propelling me into my own form of sensory dysregulation. The tart, bitterness of lemons overpowering any effort to taste the sugary sweetness of lemonade in that moment. Can anyone relate?
It’s Friday and the end of what has felt like a long and exceptionally difficult week. Likely the byproduct of changing weather, daylight savings time looming and hitting the one-year milestone of living life in a pandemic. Normally I try to push through feelings that contradict my steadfast desire to remain hopeful, optimistic and totally dialed in. But not today.
Today I gave myself the space to feel it all. And the grace to avoid any obligation to find the silver lining for a moment. I turned on an audio book (my most consistent form of self care lately), lit a candle that reminded me of quality time spent with my mom and sisters, drank some coffee, called my mom (I’m quickly approaching 40 and she often still serves as MY emotional regulator) and connected with a few friends via quick texts.
It didn’t necessarily mitigate the overwhelming feeling of simultaneously being pulled in a million directions, or the frustration of still living life in a pandemic. Or the staggering desire for a break. But allowing myself to live in the feelings for a brief moment felt like an empowering reset. A conscious choice. And after a little bit, I revisited my mantra from last week…”Pull your hair back, pour some coffee, handle it.”
And that’s exactly what I’ll do today. Handle it. I just needed to take a brief detour, pausing with my flashers on to tend to my own needs and feelings before finding my way there. Now…does anyone have a wand they can wave that will magically deep clean my house and permanently eliminate all of the clutter? If so… I’m your girl. I’m fantasizing about living a minimalist lifestyle in a pristine, modern RV. I should probably cool-it with the documentaries, ha.
Sending some extra love and grace to those having a day or week that’s more lemons than lemonade. May you find a moment to pause, feel all the feelings, and then find a clear path forward.
by Annie | Mar 10, 2021 | Blog
I don’t know about you, but Monday came in like a LION over here (and actually Tuesday and Wednesday did too… is it the weather?!). In the midst of our rollercoaster of a morning, my sister sent me a TikTok video that included a recipe for cloud dough (bless her for coming through with a great idea when I needed it!). I showed it to Fletcher and he wanted to make it IMMEDIATELY.
Since we’re still doing school virtually, we have an extra hour in the mornings. Sometimes that’s helpful and other times it’s more of a challenge. Yesterday, it was the former, as it allowed us a little more time to settle into the day. When Fletcher expressed an interest in making the recipe, I quickly gathered the ingredients (cheap conditioner and cornstarch) so as not to miss the window of opportunity and we got to work.
It was super simple – 2 parts cornstarch to 1 part conditioner. You can choose to include food coloring, but we tend to be food coloring enthusiasts and it was right before we needed to get online so I didn’t even mention it…we’ll save that for a weekend. And clouds are white…. so it worked!
We made two batches and found that the dough formed better by incorporating the ingredients by hand rather than using a wooden spoon or spatula. The kneading, folding and mixing of the cornstarch and conditioner gave Fletcher some really nice sensory input and seemed to slow his racing mind a bit. And… it was just enough to ease his transition into school. For that, I was incredibly grateful.
We left the ball of cloud dough in a bowl on the table and Fletcher played with it in between his virtual classes throughout the day. It’s a nice consistency – more play dough than slime or oobleck which tend to be a lot messier. Max, who tends to avoid weird or slimy textures, even gave the dough a few drive-by, non-committal pokes which was a win for him! We will, without a doubt, be adding this recipe to our sensory tool box.
There are tons of recipes online if you search for Cloud Dough. Some include other ingredients and flare, but I loved this minimalist approach – super easy! For all you TikTok lovers, you can view the video we used for our recipe here.
Now… here’s to easier mornings the rest of the week?! I’m speaking that into existence for all of us :).
by Annie | Mar 6, 2021 | Blog
While usually a welcome break from the weekly grind, weekends can also be hard. We thrive on structure and even though we all need a break come Friday, we also still need activities to keep us engaged so we aren’t completely off the rails come Monday. When the weather is nice, we’re outside as much as possible. Hiking, throwing the baseball around, visiting parks and playgrounds. Winter months are a little trickier, however. So we work to find other ways to structure our time – board games, cards, obstacle courses, tub time, sensory bins, and some messy fun.
We do a lot of science experiments in our house. Fletcher loves mixing baking soda and vinegar and watching it overflow out of a glass jar . He enjoys using food coloring to make different color combinations and really anything that encourages him to put on safety goggles and an apron so he “looks the part.” It never fails. That highly sought-after “reaction” never seizes to amaze him and I hope he never loses his sense of wonder.
We recently made Oobleck. It was a first for us and at the time I didn’t realize that this science experiment is derived from Dr. Seuss’s book, Bartholomew and the Oobleck. It turns out the timing is great since most elementary schools celebrated Dr. Seuss’s birthday this past week.
While our sensory-avoider wasn’t a fan of this gooey substance, our sensory-seeker was all in. Fletcher was enamored with how Oobleck transitions from a solid to a liquid and back to a solid again. He enjoyed playing with color combinations, dipping his hands as far into the bowl as he could, and pounding it onto the table all the while describing what he was feeling, seeing and hearing. Mixing all of the ingredients also incorporated a little heavy work (bonus!). It’s a sensory-seeker’s dream.
The great part about Oobleck is it isn’t fancy. The recipe calls for cornstarch, water and food coloring which are items many of us have on hand. If you search for Oobleck online, you’ll have lots of options to choose from and even some instructional videos. We used a recipe from the Scientific American.
I want to qualify this post by saying that sometimes finding fun and engaging weekend activities feels effortless, but often we’re so exhausted from the week that it feels like one more thing. Do we have screen time in our house? Yes. Sometimes that feels like the only way to center our guys for a moment, an opportunity for us to take a breath and regroup. And while there always seems to be that voice in the back of my head reminding me of all the reasons screen time is the devil, I have to counteract that by giving myself grace (easier said than done). We’re in the middle of a pandemic and at the tail end of winter. I don’t love screen time for our boys, but I also know that sometimes we have to do what keeps us sane. And I’m extending that same grace to all of you. XOXO
Happy weekend!
by Annie | Mar 2, 2021 | Blog
Whew. We are on the struggle bus this week. It’s Tuesday, but everything has felt hard. EVERYTHING. I think it’s a combination of things – we’re burned out from virtual learning, the weather is still cold so we haven’t had as much outside time, there was a full moon over the weekend and maybe a growth spurt.
What could normally be a quick “Fletcher, when the timer goes off, please put your shoes on.” “Okay, Mom.” exchange has become a knock-down drag-out battle of the wills. Every. Single. Time. It doesn’t seem to matter what strategies I try to employ or how much lead time I give him. As he has said, “it’s just too hard.”
I noticed that I was losing it a bit this morning. My patience isn’t infinite and even when I dig as deeply as I can, sometimes there just isn’t anything left in my tank. But before I had a pity party (that’s not to say you shouldn’t let yourself feel all the emotions that come with this journey. You absolutely should. All of those feelings are valid.) I remembered a shirt I saw yesterday. It said something similar to “Put your hair up. Pour some coffee. Handle it.”
Yes…handle it. That little mantra allowed me to get out of my head and out of my feelings and handle it today. After a really tough day yesterday, Fletcher started out the day with what felt like a 180. I was hopeful. We changed things up a bit, really limited screen time and made sure to start preparing him for today by talking through our day last night. But by his morning break time it was clear he needed a giant dose of sensory input to help him regulate and organize. I had been the recipient of his dysregulation this morning and while I knew it wasn’t personal, I also knew I could not sustain a calm response to his sharp words and impulsive actions for the remainder of the day. I needed to handle it.
Normally between his virtual meets we sneak in a dance break or some other movement, but I wasn’t sure that would be enough. So instead, we took our puppy on a walk and stacked sensory strategy on sensory strategy on sensory strategy – packing in as much as we could. In addition to Fletcher moving his body in the cold fresh air which is good input to begin with, I gave him a blow pop. We try to avoid added sugar if we can help it, but I knew that today he could use the extra input punch of sucking that tart candy shell and then chewing the gum at the center. I had him hold onto the leash for a bit so he’d also get the resistance of our energetic pup pulling in various directions (heavy work) and we ended our walk at the nearby playground.
Like he does with most things, Fletcher experienced our walk with all of his senses, finding even more ways to get the input he so desperately needed. He forcefully stomped on ice, climbed uneven snow banks, held frozen icicles, shouted while we were under a freeway overpass to hear his loud echo, noticed snow that had melted into the shape of a heart, felt the frigid air on his cheeks and furiously pumped his legs on a swing at the park. All in a matter of 30 minutes.
There was a noticeable difference in his ability to focus for his next virtual class. He loathes fine motor activities, but he cut several items, glued them onto a separate sheet and was so engaged that he eagerly contributed to the class discussion when called on. He put his weighted blanket on his lap independently, didn’t use any of his fidgets and didn’t need any coaching to stay on task. THAT was a 180.
Fletcher and I were alone together in the car shortly after he finished school for the day. He asked me to turn on our favorite song and we sang at the top of our lungs together – it’s our tried and true collective reset button that we use several times a week. We ALWAYS feel better afterwards.
And now here I sit. Overly caffeinated, ponytail a little higher and tighter than normal, celebrating that IT…was handled. I have been at this long enough to know that what worked today may not work tomorrow, but I’ve also learned the importance of acknowledging and being proud of small victories. It helps me live in the moment, reminding myself that even though this can be hard, in the words of Glennon Doyle, “we can do hard things.”
