It’s early December and here we are… in that really tricky time between holidays (and both of our boys have December birthdays, too!). Several weeks that are packed with an abundance of things to celebrate and yet riddled with anticipation, excitement, sugar highs, choirs of “how long until?’ and if you’re like me, some anxiety about how to manage all of the things and all of the emotions that are along for the ride.
We do a lot of countdowns, timers, visual schedules, calendars and an intense sensory diet, but Fletcher, bless his heart, gets so laser-focused on holiday related details and has a hard time deviating from those thoughts.
For example…one of my aunts gets the kids advent calendars each year which they love. Fletcher especially looks forward to them. He’s been asking every day for weeks how many days until December 1st. The countdown has been real. So yesterday was the day. He got to search for the number one, carefully open the little cardboard door and remove his long awaited chocolate treat. Perfect. We were good then, right?
Wrong. Because he knows that everyday from December 1st until Christmas Eve he gets to do the same thing. And while this is meant to be something fun for him, it’s a lot of temptation to not open every door in one sitting. And again another balancing act.
After several go-arounds, I know that this time of year is especially intense for us. Intense doesn’t necessarily mean hard, bad, or dreadful. We still find lots of joy. It just requires a different mindset on my part. Being mentally prepared seems to help me pack the extra patience and temper my responses. I know that Fletcher is going to ask the same question multiple times. He’s trying to organize his mind around what to expect when. Understanding that helps me help him. And at almost 7, I’m working hard to help Fletcher come up with his own strategies and ways for managing his excitement and anticipation as well which takes a little bit off of me.
I know that without a doubt the “most wonderful time of year” is anything but for a lot of people and I’m extending holiday solidarity “holidarity” if you will, to anyone else helping kiddos who struggle to navigate such exciting, unstructured and anticipatory times.
XOXO